Louisville and Tinder Part V

It's been so long since I have blogged that I don't even remember how to do it, or where to begin.  But I figure that I better go ahead and make an attempt, since I have been getting some passive aggressive comments pointed at my lack of posting.  Hopefully, by the time I get back from Louisville, I will have remembered how to blog.

I'm writing this from Louisville, Kentucky, where the indoor Nationals are taking place for NFAA.  You may be wondering why I am here.  Well, I can't tell you that until you buy me like 3 beers.  Kake took me to pick up the rental car yesterday, and she asked where I was going, and I told her, and she could not comprehend that I was going to Louisville all by myself, since the concept of independent travel does not compute in her head.

It's so cool to see tons of folks walking around carrying bows and arrows.  There are archery people EVERYWHERE!

Archery people are weird.  I am telling you this as an informant from the inside.  As I left practice tonight, this guy followed behind me and talked THE ENTIRE WALK from the convention center to my floor in the hotel.  I have never seen this person before, and wasn't even returning the conversation; he was just happy to talk to my back.  Then there was this other really weird guy in a crowded elevator who was really bizarro, and when he left the elevator, the two young archers left with me were saying very mean things about him.  I said before leaving the elevator, as if by explanation, "Archery people are weird." And they both exclaimed, "REALLY WEIRD!  We are all really weird!"

Myself excluded, of course.  And my inner circle of archery people.  OKAY FINE, we are all weird, but at least me and my group are normal-weird, more like quirky, and not like uncomfortable, creepy weird.

Wish me luck in my shooting this weekend; I need it.  I brought all of my lucky things with me.

Okay, I have 3 other blogs in the works, I just haven't posted them  yet, so stay tuned.  Until then, here are some Tinder gems for you.

First of all and for the record, it is super awkward to bump into colleagues, ex-roommates, and other people you simply don't want to run into on Tinder.  You do not even know.

Okay, okay here you go:

Can't tell which direction to swipe.... 

It's so bad, yet so, so good.

This is your pick up line?  This?  Seriously?!

And here is one on par with that one...

Here are a bunch of other nopes:

"What is that?! Did he catch underwear?" - Meg

"No, I think it is a skate." - Me

"Oh.  Maybe his pick up line should be, 'I will catch your heart like I caught this skate." -Meg

He should catch some pants.

"Vomit."

Um... never.  

Oh wait, never mind; sign me up.

I actually believe I dated this guy already, in my late teens:

This is this guy's leading profile picture.  WHY?!

Okay, brace yourself for this:

I actually could name a few people who would like to name Jon, but alas, 

I do not write for Sex & The City.

Okay, listen, I get that people have pasts, and that people make mistakes, but why would you put the photo of you LEAVING PRISON as your only profile photo??

And then, of course, we have the guy who acts like he is not cheating on his wife.  I think that this guy legitimately did not know how Tinder worked yet, and that I could see multiple photos.  Tinder pulls your profile from your Facebook account - you don't just build a profile, so he might not have realized that yet.  Or, (and this is never too far from my mind,) his whole Tinder account was created as a test by his wife, and she is testing to see what would happen if he went on the market.  Women (okay, people) are twisted, so this kind of stuff happens.

Okay, multiple photos of he and his wife:

So he says hello to me, and I respond, and don't take long to cut right to the chase:

And then.. DELETE!  He was gone.  He must have realized the actual deal with Tinder.  Once someone "unmatch"es with you, everything, including your conversation, vanishes from history.  That's why I was taking screen shots live, as the convo was happening, because I knew he would cancel the conversation.

I-see-what-you-did-there.  This guy is back!

Okay, even just having to look at those photos just to upload them here has me wanting to toss my cookies, as they say.

Here are two who I didn't know what to do:

Okay, you are both border-line d-bags, because even though these photos are very d-bag-y, you've done a good job on making it seem like you are not posing for a Tinder picture.  Decisions, decisions.  GET IT?  D-cisions. Ha. Punny.

This was good:

Also, Facebook has been suggesting sites for me, such as this:

And similar dating sites about "These single dads are done with games.  Sign up now!"

You're on my list, Facebook.  You better watch yourself.

That's all of the Tinder things I have for you.  Those were actually from about a month ago, and I have been too busy over the past couple of weeks to be on it searching again for good ones for you.

Okay... wish me luck!