Tinder Part III, Photos, Disney

Hello.  I'm just going to jump right into the treasures I have found on Tinder lately.

What happens more often than not is that I totally forget to Tinder, especially when I am OUT, like, that whole trip to the west I just took.  I bet I could have found some real gems in Vegas.  Alas, I never remember.

Oh man, that phone, tho.  He is obviously wealthy and an amazing catch, made clear by the new technology and his P bling, etc.

There are an astounding number of photos posted like these two: 

See what they did there?  I'm pretty mad about Brandon though, because he has about 4 other photos like that, except I accidently zoomed out and swiped left, and once you left-swipe someone, you can never get them back.  Believe me, I tried on this one.

And then there are the guys who have these ridiculous fitness photos:

This is the best:

Women can not relate to these photos, unless you are the chick in the above photo, second from left.

Do you know what kind of profile to which women CAN relate?

Pizzacake.  That's who.

This may just be personal preference, but I swipe left to car selfies.

Especially people who are clearly DRIVING AND CAR SELFIE-ING:

And then there are a lot of guys who post who are clearly married.  With almost all of them, I swipe left so quickly because I have never understood their angle (or, perhaps, I understand it all too well.)  However, on this one, I decided to swipe right, to see exactly the game plan here.

Meet Rob:

Okay, so far, I would have been looking for an explaination of, "girl in pic is my sister," or something. That happens a lot.  But then...

Ummmmm....

But wait, there's more!...

  

That's it.  Those are all of Rob's photos.  So, I swipe right.

Within seconds, he's chatting with me:

This went on for another few minutes... just meaningless nothing conversation.  But then, I got distracted, and forgot to check for a few hours, and by the time I came back to Tinder, he was gone.  Sorry, you guys.  :-(

Well, that's all the Tinder there is for now.

And now to clear out my phone of other photos:

Remember how I told you about my step dad wanting a thermal engineer thing for Christmas?  I forgot to show you this picture.  After he unwrapped it, he was pointing it at stuff to take temperatures of things, including my cats.  It turned into just playing with the red laser dot.  This was very entertaining for him.

I had lunch the other day with some ex-colleagues.  One of them, every time I see him, he tells me that he loves his office.  Pimping out his office was one of the final projects I took on before leaving that job (part of my job was facilities.)  Because our ongoing jokes there were all Anchorman related, I pimped out his new office in mahogany furnishings, since he was becoming a big deal (moving from a cube to an office.)  I mean, I really pimped out his office.  Mahogany-lined white board, desk furnishings, paperclip holder, everything.  Now, every time we have lunch or whatever, he says, "No, like, legit - I love lamp.  I love, love lamp.  I love carpet, I love lamp, I love chair, I love everything."  It's very funny.

Food

First of all, is this real life?  People feed children this garbage?? 

Next, if you don't already know, I come from a group of folks whom share everything at the table.  If you are ordering a meal, and you actually want to eat it, you need to literally throw your body over top of it, otherwise, other forks are going to land in your food.  Especially if Sue is there.  I'm telling you this in the interest of warning you, however, many of you probably already know this.  Feel free to share your stories and sad tales (Meg.)

 

This is my favorite thing I make for myself: mini bagel covered in veggi creamcheese, an inch of spinach, over-medium egg, salt & pepper.  Just FYI. 

Okay, I'll have actual stuff to talk to you about next time, not just a bunch of random photos. Maybe.

Also, I have not seen the following Disney movies, and I am ashamed:

• Pocahontas
• Sleeping Beauty
• Peter Pan
• Robin Hood

Okay, laters babe.

I left work 10 minutes early yesterday to make sure I caught this sunset.  When I told my colleague this, she scoffed.  Well... some people just don't understand the important things in life. 

Trip Out West

Okay, so I’ve been home from vacation for almost a week and a half and I have not posted a blog.  I’m the worst, I know.

Vacation was a lot of fun and had a lot of ups and downs.  It’s the same trip I took a couple of years ago at Christmas. 

I’ve never liked the desert.  I know that this doesn’t surprise you.  I don’t like it simply because I am a creature of the forest and I die without it.  I can, however, appreciate the desert.  I appreciate the beauty of the colors throughout the day. 

I respect the desert in the way that one respects the ocean; it is unpredictable and wild, and when you are in the desert, you mind your manners and respect what is around you, and understand that you are temporarily there, and you will be moving along, or else you will perish.  You are on borrowed time in the desert, just the same as you are when in the ocean.  Of course, I’m talking about the actual desert; not the cities, or the areas around water, but the actual desert. 

Like the ocean, it’s something to be admired from afar, visited briefly, and left how you found it.  To me, the desert reeks of ancient and unfounded history; the people who inhabit it are like early American pioneers; tough and a bit wily, just like the land.

I’ll preface this next part by saying that I am not the person who is usually trying to make conversation with folks in public. 

On the flight out, when boarding the plane, the guys in front of me were talking about their bows, because they could see them being loaded onto the plane.  So, of course, I had to ask them about it.  They said they were on their way to Utah to hunt for wild cats.  Which is a good thing, because I heard that they are running low on those :: insert heavy sarcasm. ::

All I have to say to that is Ew.

I was knocked out the first few hours of the flight, since it was a 7 AM flight, but I was awake the last hour or so.  When I woke up, we were approaching the desert.  I always have a window seat, so I had been looking out the window for a while, when the very tall Asian man sitting next to me leaned over and said, “What is that??”  I said, “It’s the desert.”  He said, “I don’t understand… why are there no trees or anything?!”  He could not comprehend. 

I got to talking to him for a while, and it turns out that he is on some sort of bucket-list quest (I didn’t press for details.)  He is from China, and he said he was on his way to the desert to ride ATVs through the desert.  He would see out of the window a few scattered trailers, and he asked what they were.  

When I tried to explain that people lived there, he could not wrap his mind around it.  “Why would they live in the middle of nowhere?  There are no trees – no life!”  I told him I didn’t understand it either, but some people just like that sort of thing.  Anyway, it was nice to talk to someone who was experiencing such things for the first time.  I hope he had a good time.

I flew into Vegas, and my darlingest preciousness dearest friend picked me up from the airport.  We then proceeded directly to In-N-Out Burger, as first order of business.

I want to take a minute to just express how very sad I am for you folks whom have never been to an In-N-Out Burger.  Frankly, I don’t know how you get by in life.  It’s a staple in the lives of everyone west of the Rockies.  It’s a block in the path of my life’s journey – a fond memory all through my childhood. 

Anyway, then we went to The Celine Store in Caesar’s Palace, to browse and otherwise pay our respects to The Queen.

Then I got my rental car and was on my way.

I spent a few wonderful days with my sister.  We went fishing and shopping and sheeping.

Feeshing

Sheeping

The lambs were just running back and forth, so cute!!

And, of course, the ol' family videos came out.

Me and my sister at Disney World 1k years ago.

My sister is one of the funniest people I know.  (It’s a family trait.)   For example, we were in the shopping mall in Laughlin, and I innocently proposed the idea of stopping by to visit a store which had several varieties of candy apples on display – caramel apples, snickers covered apples, M&Ms covered apples, rocky road apples – you name it, they had it.  We did our shopping first, and then stopped in the store on our way out.  Listen, we simply could not agree on an apple to split.  I don’t really like nuts in my food, and she only wanted the kinds that had nuts.  So, I kind of mentioned that we don’t really NEED one, we can just leave the store…  So we leave. 

We’re walking through the mall, and all of a sudden, I notice that my sister had been saying stuff under her breath for a while.  I take a listen, and I hear, very quiet, and very slow, “asssssssssssssshhhhooollllllllllee….”  

GASP!  How long had she been saying that?!   I kindly asked her if she was trying to say something.  She exploded, “I was just trying to have some FRUIT!  I was just trying to have some of my daily nutritional value, serving of fruits & veggies, and you ruined EVERYTHING! Assssshooooollllllee…”  

And this continued, the entire way back to the truck.  And then in the truck.  And then she called her wife and told on me.  I didn’t know what to say; I never had a justification.  

I later told my sister's wife, “We Miglins are very funny people!”  She said, without skipping a beat and without looking up, “That’s because you are all crazy people, and you can’t help yourselves.”   Touché.

So, the apple situation came up again about every 15-20 minutes for the rest of my trip.  I can still hear it at night whilst I slumber… “Assssssshoooolllllllle.”

Anyway, then I decided to bring the snow as I departed, and I brought the snow all the way to California. 

My sister said I am a snow fairy, and when I got back to the office, my colleagues were relentless in the Ice Queen jokes.  I can’t even deny it anymore. 

I got to L.A. to my other sister’s house, and we went out for New Year’s Eve to The Ivy in L.A..  

It was a very lovely meal, and I had never been there, so it was very nice.  Also it was fun to see all the cars worth twice as much $$ as my house costs roll up to the restaurant.  

I love that scene.  Given some sleep and night cream, and proper makeup and hair, I could really work that scene.

We went to the Rose Parade the next morning, and even though it was chilly, it was really so much fun. 

Then I hopped in the car and went to visit my niece in Long Beach overnight, followed by a very lovely brunch.  Afterwards, I went back to L.A. to meet my mother and stepdad at the Warner Brother’s studios, and did a tour, which included the Friends Central Perk set and a Harry Potter exhibit.

 So, that was my trip out West.  I don’t know what other vacations I will be planning this year.  What kind of journeys will you be making this year?
 

Mt. Vernon

Mt. Vernon

Saturday, I went to (one of my) boyfriends’ house and had a party on his lawn.  

George and Martha Washington hosted an awesome holiday party.  There were horses, and hot apple cider, and fireworks choreographed to Celine Dion, and it was basically Heaven.  It was not freezing, which was great, since we sat on the lawn to watch the fireworks because we didn’t have time to run back and get chairs from my car.  It was a mild night, beautiful weather, and the fireworks were reflected over the glassy Potomac River.  

Paired with good company and good health, one simply could not ask for anything more.

I’ve never been to Mt. Vernon when it’s been warm out.  I don’t know why, but I always end up going when it is freezing out and there is nothing green or floral to see.

Last year, I went to Mt. Vernon for the day and spent a great deal of time walking around the property with Kate.  

Fast history – George wanted to be buried here:

which was an old family crypt in a lovely nook of the property, but they moved his tomb (after realizing the crypt was just in bad condition, and then someone tried- and failed - to steal his body, so it was time to go) to a new mausoleum which is further away and gigantic, and now Martha was buried near him (along with the other family members.)  

The old crypt still stands, but is in disrepair.  It still is one of my favorite spots on the property because it is so lovely.

When I went with Kake a couple years ago, there was hardly anyone there because it was freezing and windy.  

This is one of our favorite photos of us.  

I hug the trees (I know, it's embarrassing) when I go to Mt. Vernon, especially this one, which George himself planted.

We got to the mausoleum, which is always guarded.  We were not being disruptive, just casually chatting about things we were seeing, but this lady was being such a jerk and was giving us the side-eye and shushing us.   It was outrageous. There was no one else there.  

I mean, I get it; it’s a place of sanctity and silence.  If there were other people around, I would get that it’s really a place for just walking up, paying respects, and walking away.  But, as there was no one there, we were just casually talking about the trees around and the architecture and whatever else, but this lady was being such a b.  So, I went up and hung out with George for a minute, just to hang out with his presence and say hi, and then I turned on my heel to leave, and looked down, and there was a $20 at my feet. 

It’s as if George himself said, “Hey gurl.  Sorry about my betches, you know how they can be; they’re just looking out for me.  How much was your ticket?  $18?  Here’s a $20.  Sorry, boo.”

Someone remind me to go back to Mt. Vernon in the Spring.  Actually, let's go together.  

(Are you still wondering why someone would try to steal G.W.'s body?  Me, too.  I mean, what... why?... what would one even do... Maybe we don't want to know.)

Side note, I just Google image searched George Washington, and this site came up, which YOU HAVE TO GO SEE.  Maybe I am the only one who finds it as funny as I do, but I am sitting here dying at my computer from choking back the fits of laughter.  I can only look at one at a time and then I have to look away, because they are so funny.

Well, I hope you have a great Christmas.  I'll be traveling for a while, so I will post again upon my return, boasting of several adventures, I'm sure.

Merry Christmas!!

Goodbye Forever, Hong Kong, Army/Navy

Look at my neighbor's house.

Complete with life-size, talking waving Santa.

And that is just the front.
I love it.

Goodbye Forever

I don’t know when it happened, but at some point in my life, I picked up the habit of saying, “Goodbye forever!” whenever I leave work.  

This can be traced back to one of my very first jobs, when I was 15 years old working at Taco Bell. My friend (with whom I worked there, and several other jobs to come) said that was one of the things he loved about working with me;  at the end of my shift, I would say, “okay, I’m leavin’ y’all!!”  And then I would come back in about 3-4 more times because I kept forgetting things, and then finally, when I actually had everything, I would say, “OKAY GOOD BYE FOREVER!!” 

I must do it still to this day, more often than I think.  One day recently, I was leaving work, and I said, “Okay, bye.”  I was answered with a choir of “Okay, goodbye forever,” from all of the guys.  I just started laughing and laughing.  We all took a minute to talk about it.  I said, “Do I say that?”  And they said, “Yes, you say it all the time, and we didn’t know what to make of it at first!”  

I told them that I’ve always said it, and I don’t know why – I guess you just never actually know if it is goodbye forever!  I have to walk across a lot of streets in the city!  And the one guy who is from Kenya (we have a pretty cultural group) told me, “See, that’s what we’ve figured, and now we get it and think it’s funny, but at first I was really worried, because we don’t talk about such things in my culture.”  And I told him that you have to talk about things!  And he said, “Well, now I get it, now it is okay, but it was a learning experience.”

It’s like that story in “The Princess Bride” where the Dread Pirate Roberts says every single night, "Good night, Westley. Good work. Sleep well. I'll most likely kill you in the morning."  Click here for the reference.

Hong Kong

I have to say “goodbye forever” to two of my very good friends soon.  They (husband and wife) are part of the archery family, and they are moving to Hong Kong in a couple of weeks because they were both offered jobs at a college over there.  Can you even imagine being given 3-4 weeks to just move across the world?  They have to find places for everything – from furniture to their cars and pets.  Neither of them speak the language.  I can’t even imagine.

Well, I need them to learn quickly, so that they know what is going on over there by the time I go to visit them.  I have never in my life wanted to visit the Asian countries.  I don’t know why; it’s just never appealed to me.  But now they are going, so I have to visit.  It’s just like Florida – I do NOT like Florida, and yet I’m always there for some reason or another. 

Well anyway, if you have any helpful tips for my friends, please feel free to pass them along, and I am sure that they could use all the help they can get.  I will miss them.

Army/Navy Game

I have weird hearing, and can hear things very far away, like music in restaurants that no one else can hear, and I can process three conversations at once. 

(Although if one conversation takes me away from the others, it can lead to a lot of confusion.  For example, yesterday, this guy Kevin was at my desk talking about how his hair was really long in the 80’s and then I noticed that the box marked “produce” which was delivered to the lady across from me was walking away.  I started chasing the box, not willing to miss out on the opportunity for free quality pears.  I tracked down the girl carrying the box, and expressed my concern, and she laughed and said we could open the box together.  We opened it, and lo and behold…. Cookies.  DARN THE LUCK!  I said how disappointed I was, since I really thought I was going to get free produce, and then it was noted that I was probably the only person in the whole office who would be mad about cookies not being produce.  As we were discussing this, Kevin slowly rounded the corner, with such a confused look on his face, and I just started laughing and apologizing.  He said, (whilst laughing) “I was in the middle of a sentence, and you just ran away…” I said, “Yeah, I know,  I’m sorry.  I tend to do that a lot.”  And he said he was used to it by now.)

So I heard what sounded like a bunch of low-flying helicopters in the distance yesterday, and I ran over to the window to see what was going on.  Turns out it was a bunch of low-flying helicopters coming over the harbor.  I also saw a ton of people gathering, so I grabbed my coat and went outside.  Army and Navy were outside having a huge pep rally for the Army/Navy football game today, and I gotta admit – I had SO MUCH FUN watching the pep rally.

Go Army!

Go Navy!

I usually would lean towards considering myself more of a Navy girl, but, when the Army band broke out into some Taylor Swift yesterday, I must admit that I was nearly swayed:

The pull-up challenge - Who can do the most pull-ups in 5 minutes?

Very fun to watch!

Now I REALLY want to go to the Army/Navy game.  :-(

Star Wars, Thermal Engineers

Star/Office Wars

There was a minor explosion at work yesterday when it was discovered that I have never seen Star Wars. 

I think I just heard the sound of half of my followers slamming the door behind them on their way out.

I didn’t know it was such a hot button issue, okay?? 

The conversation went something like, “And I showed the website to Veronica, but she didn’t think it was funny because she didn’t get it.”  So I say, “I’ve never seen Star Wars.” 

Just then, a cold, dark chill swept the room.  The lights flickered.  The hanging florescent lights suddenly started shaking and swaying in a sudden inexplicable, icy gust.

A choir sounded from all around me.  “You’ve WHAT?  Not even ONE?”   

I told them that I feel like it’s normal for people to not have seen Star Wars, and that they are all nerds, and not by any means a proper representation of the US populous as a whole.  They completely disagreed.  I said that I thought it was weird that none of them have seen all of the Twilights.  They said that was TOTALLY different.  I said it wasn’t different to me.  Or how about Lord of the Rings?  Harry Potter? 

It was a stalemate.  None of us had anything to say to each other.  You could have cut the tension with a knife.  There was fire in every one's eyes.   The temp was inconsolable.

Anyway, yadda yadda yadda, now I’m not friends with any of them, and I’ve been uninvited to all company holiday events.

Thermal Engineers

Speaking of the holidays, it is so hard to buy Christmas gifts for men.  I say this as a woman, since men are probably saying how hard it is to buy for women.  But really, with women, you can’t go wrong with anything that smells good (lotions, candles, food) or you know… money.   

But what do you buy for a man who 1) has everything (and is all set in the BBQ area)  and 2) is not into things like golf, or golf packages, or golf retreats?  This is what I was running into with my step dad, and everyone at work is very unhelpful, since they all like golf.   So, he finally actually made a Christmas list, and now, ladies, I have the answer to all of your holiday buying guide needs for the NASA thermal engineer YOU know! 

 Here it is!!! (This is the link to the item)

And, don't forget one of THESE!!!

Please disguise your jealousy.  I know, now you want one.  Well, get in line!

Okay, I've run out of things to say to you for right now.

IM from temp (I am so proud.)

9:40 AM Temp

(*_*) Q------(-_-Q)

Knockout

Kids these days are so clever with their internets.