The Holidays Are Here!

Hello!

Hope that you are getting into the holiday spirit, and signing your Christmas cards and mailing them off today, if you haven’t already done so.

I will be spending Christmas with my sister, which I am very excited about, since we haven’t had an actual Christmas together since I was like 8 years old.

 Santa on Socials

Fun fact:  Santa Claus is on social media.  He has his own Facebook page, and he live streams a lot.  

He live-streams from snow-covered places he visits, and you get to hear plinkly, plunky holiday music laid overtop the gently pitter patter of snow falling whilst gazing upon a wintery, relaxing scene.  It’s fun to have on, just playing in your earbuds whilst you are typing away completing your normal activities.

Of course, people tune in and start writing in their comments.  Don’t spend too much time reading the comments, because you’ll get bored or depressed.   Most people are just saying fun things like, “Santa is real! I believe!” "Hello to my grandchildren, from Denver, CO!"  And there is a lot of fun connection from people from all over the world saying where they are and sending well-wishes, prayers, and lots of encouragement. 

There are also lots of people who use the comments as a live connection to a proverbial deity figure, sending prayers for their loved ones,

Trying to cope with misery,

And there are plenty of folks sending Santa-sized requests like, “Santa, are you real? Could you possibly bring home our troops this Christmas?”

And then others may respond and send very encouraging words, and sometimes it briefly turns into a support group for cancer survivors or the like.  

It unites people together, and therefore, I believe in Santa.

 

I did so many fun things over Thanksgiving!

My brother (the 7’ tall brother) came to Maryland for the week from his new state of residence, Tennessee. He’s lived in Louisiana the past almost 10 years, and now he is starting over in TN. So, he took a bus over.

A few highlights: We went to NASA, where my stepdad works, and took a bit of a private tour there. Are you into outer space? Well then buckle your seatbelt.

Mario explained to us all about the new telescope they are sending out, the James Webb Space Telescope (click here)

We got to actually see it!

This actual thing is going to be launched into outer space, and will be able to see where life began, and if our universe is still expanding, and other things about the Big Bang!  It was very cool. 

Then, we went to my stepdad’s office area, and played with his toys.  Well, we didn’t actually touch anything, but he explained all the things, and showed us compression chambers and stuff.

This compression chamber could probably suck up Baltimore!

So, my stepdad made this thing with his hands.  It's a compression chamber which will test space matter to see if it can withstand the temperature and pressure.  That machine was set to something like -220 degrees F.   He makes all sorts of things like this!!

We also saw this machine/mirror that is for optical engineering (I have no idea about what its actual purpose is,) and it has a ton of little mirrors which zoom right in on your eyeball as soon as you get in front of it.  I went to take a photo of it, and it thought my phone camera lens was the eyeball (which is true) so that’s what this photo is:

Here is the machine, stand in front of it but DON'T TOUCH IT

Look up close:

ICE! and E.T.

We also went to ICE! at the Gaylord National Harbor.  You should totally go!  It was so much fun.  I went a few years ago, and it was cute (they did “Frosty The Snowman”), but it wasn’t as good as this year!   This year  is something like, “Christmas Around The World,” and it was fun!

Nativity scene

Flag ornaments

Bet you can't spot me!

E.T.

We also went to The Kennedy Center to see the National Symphony Orchestra play the score to “E.T.”.  I didn’t realize that they were actually going to play the movie, and have the symphony play in front of the screen! 

It was absolutely amazing, I loved it.  You should definetly look to see when local orchestras are doing stuff like that again.  This morning I passed a billboard that was advertising “It’s A Wonderful Life” by the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra.   Here, here is the website.  click here.  You better go!  I want to see that Facebook check-in!!

Finally, we made a trip up to NYC to visit our great Aunt again, as you may remember we did a couple of years ago.  It’s so good to see her and her family. 

Okay, so that’s my news!

Also, at around 3 AM Thanksgiving morning, I got a message from Mike with this photo:

I love the story of Veronica.  I remember connecting instantly with her when I saw the depiction of her actions in the movie “The Passion.”   

As Jesus was stumbling and falling and bleeding and desperate walking towards Calvary, he fell a few times carrying his own gigantic cross.  One time when he fell, this lady ran to him, devil-may-care, and brought him water and wiped his face and just took a moment to BE with him, amidst the chaos and panic and torture.  

Probably, she could have been executed right on the spot, but the Lord put his hand over the whole situation.  Nothing else mattered in the world at that moment, only that she was going to run towards who she believed in.

When she looked at the rag used to wipe his face, his image remained in the blood and sweat soaked fabric.  Hence, she was dubbed the lady of the True Icon – Vera Icon. Veronica.  Click here for more.

I’d like to think I would do the same thing.

I’m going to start signing all of my emails with this signature:

Veronica

True Image, LLC

Okay, have a nice holiday!

Saw this sign at a barber shop in Pennsylvania

Guest Writers, My Sister

Hello.

I'd like to open up the floor here.  If you'd like to submit an essay for this blog, I'd love to have you as a guest writer.  

What could you write?  You should write about that thing you have been meaning to write about.  Maybe it's a lesson you've learned in your old age/wisdom, or just a funny experience you had, or a short story which is totally fictional, or perhaps a brief autobiography.  Maybe you were reading a magazine article, or a Chipotle cup, or this blog, or a billboard sign, and have thought, "I could do that." But you haven't had a platform to put it on.  Well, I'd like to feature a few stories.  

I believe that every single person walking this earth has a story to be told.  We have all walked different paths - even if two people have lived the exact same life (unlikely,) their perspectives and the lessons they learned will be different. 

I've written an essay on my sister.  It was a test to myself to see if I could write about one singular topic, and also, I've been meaning to write about her.  So, here goes!

Essay On My Sister

I would like to talk to you about my sister.

This entry is about a year overdue.  I have been waiting and waiting to write it, and now it is time to do it justice.  It's been like the song bouncing around in my heart that needed to be written.

I want to talk to you about my sister, because probably you don't know much about her.  In fact, you probably don't know much about anyone in my family. My family tree is more of a family forest - lots of patchiness of different, independently functioning trees standing in all different areas, and I just swing around the forest willy nilly.

Since I can remember, I have not been able to explain my family map to anyone without, well, literally drawing a map.  It's hard to give the "short version" of it, so you and I will have to talk about it one day over a pineapple-ginger flip martini or three.

But, today, I want to talk about my sister.

In summery, my sister knows how to sing with all the voices of the mountains, and paint with all the colors of the wind.

(This is basically the highest compliment I know how to give.)

My sister is one of the best people in the world.  She is raw, smart, street smart, badass, beautiful, kind, jolly, and has been through some serious trials.  She's got the dirt under her nails (metaphorically speaking... she would NEVER actually have dirt under her nails) and the callouses to show that she busted her hiney to make it to where she is today.  No handouts, just grit and hard work and sweat, and lots and lots of tears. And lots and lots of love, laughter, and great memories. 

From my dad's previous marriage, I have three siblings: a brother and two sisters, and Michelle is the middle child. They are all much older than me, and growing up, I often spent my summers out visiting the three of them in L.A..

Sadly, this is one of the only photos I have of all of us together! 

This was taken Christmas 2012.

They each had their own families/houses, and it was a really fun childhood for me to be able to visit each of them.  We always had fun adventures.  We'd go to the lake (everyone is a water enthusiast - from fishing to wakeboarding,) and we'd go to the theme parks out there, or they would take me to Santa Monica or Venice.  My other sister was a producer, and she even once got me in to a filming of my favorite show at the time, Home Improvement. (JTT, gals can I get a witness?)

It probably was a huge pain in the tukas to have to babysit me for weeks, but I will never forget it, and I cherish the memories they gave to me and the time and money (lots of it) they invested into their little sister.

That side of my family is very close with each other, and they always keep up with cousins and aunts/uncles.  It's nice.  They would even include me in with them when I visited and we'd all go on family vacations, so that even people whom were not the least bit blood related to me I would refer to as "Uncle Bob" and "Aunt Betty," etc..  But this entry is about my sister.

She has always been so awesome with me.  When my dad, mom, brother (mom's child) and I moved to the other side of the country, she would sometimes come and visit.  She even would plan (with my mother) surprise visits, just to bring our dad joy.

One time when I was about 6 years old, there was a knock on the front door, so I ran and opened the door (it was a different time in the world, when people could open the front door without expecting to be killed) and there she stood, on my doorstep in Florida.  I don't remember exactly how I reacted, but she told me to go get dad, to surprise him, to tell him someone was at the front door.  

So, giddy, I ran and knocked on dad's bedroom door, and said, "Dad, Michelle is here."  He said, "Michelle, the neighbor?"  And I said, "No, Michelle my sister!"  And he thought I was just actin' a fool.  He slogged over to the door, and when he opened it and saw my sister there, he absolutely lost it. I still remember the happy tears.  She did this act a couple of times in our years living together.

Michelle was always very patient with me, just like she is with everyone.  When we would take a vacation to the lakes in California (we used to go to a quaint location called Bass Lake a lot), she would drive the boat round and round in circles, swinging the rope out to me each time I fell off the water skis, until finally I stood up. 

It might have taken me twenty tries to stand up, and I would be worn out and my arms would feel like they were going to fall off, and I would just want to give up on myself all together, but she would hoot and holler and encourage me until I actually was successful.  It wasn't just for me, either - she was (and still is) like that with everyone who came with us.

This patience is a trait that we share, and I remember it about our father, too, but don't misunderstand me - with that patience comes a white hot internal temper if there is an injustice or disrespect. You would not want to be in the path of the calm-but-true rage that comes when it's time to lay down a smack down.

She would explain things to me, like when she had braces, she would let me touch them, and when she and her wife had a baby, I talked to her on the phone while she was still in the hospital, and she explained to me what it felt like to give birth (as much as you can tell an 8 year old.)

On to that point.  Michelle knew early in life that she was gay.  Michelle grew up in a very Catholic environment, went to Catholic school, and lived in the ideal L.A. Tinseltown home of the 60s-70s. She did not fit in.  She rode motorcycles, and also earned a Black Belt.  She also played a little too hard, and decided that the best idea would be to enter a 12-step program, where she met the love of her life, Sheila.  It was a hard time and place, but they forged on together.  Sure, it was easier to live the life they were building in Los Angeles rather than some other places in America at the time, but that doesn't mean that anything was ever actually easy. 

Michelle and Sheila decided to have a child together back in the early 90s.  This came with its own host of stigmas and challenges.

I am here today telling you that Michelle and Sheila and their daughter are the healthiest family in my entire crazy widespread family forest.  I'll leave it to you to determine if that is ironic.  I am immensely proud of their daughter, who is in her mid-20s and still living in L.A., and whom I am depending on as part of my retirement plans (I KNOW YOU'RE READING THIS.) 

When the Supreme Court ruled in favor of same-sex marriage nationwide last summer, my sister & her wife were due to visit me the next day.  Living so close to Washington D.C., the celebration was vibrant and alive all around me, many of my friends were celebrating, and everything became very colorful - literally.  I was so thrilled, and I was so thrilled that I could share the moment with them.  When I asked how it felt, what it means to them, after a moment she said, "I honestly never thought I would see it in my lifetime."  It was heavy.  It was a happy occassion that I will be telling my grandkids about.

Throughout the years, Michelle has taught me so much about life, family, fishing, and home improvement.  She has also kept the spirit of our dad alive in a number of ways, including the sense of "family is family."  When I am around her, I feel less abnormal, because she and I are very similar.  We'll both burst into song about random things, and dance up and down the aisles of the stores, while her wife tries to get out of our way while continuously mumbling, "You are a bunch of crazy people."   We are also very funny.  It's a family trait.

Actually us at any given moment

Pulled over on the side of the road to go chase sheep around. 

There were hundreds of sheep!  

We also both can speak easily to strangers, and this is definitely an inherited trait.  Our dad could speak to anyone about anything, and he did.  He would just learn things about people; what they did for work, and then about that industry, and then about the tools they use in that job, and then before you know it, you could point to about anything, and ask what it is, and my dad would know the answer,  because "Oh, I knew a guy who used to work with that."  Lots of my friends will tell you that people tend to just open up around us.

We were at a Bass Pro Shop, (aka my sister's own Disneyland) and this cashier was in The Worst Mood.  She was rude and grumpy.  Within just a few smooth sentences, my sister easily pulled that girl into a smiling, happy mood.  It is so easy for her.  I think all my sister said was something like, "How is your day going, do you get a break soon?" And then this girl went into detail about how it was only her 2nd or 3rd week back from maternity leave and how she was missing her child, and then Michelle gave a little, "Oh, well only a few more hours until you can enjoy spending time with your sweet little child," and the girl whipped out her phone to show pictures, and by the time we left, that cashier was like a different person.  I took this picture because I watched it happen, and it felt like home to me.

My sister is also an avid fisherperson, and they find joy in traveling the country to find places to fish.  When they came to visit me last summer, we went out in the bay and did some fishing. 

Fishing is their passion.  When I visit them, they watch the fishing channel.  Like, they actually have recorded fishing shows and they sit there and watch it, like people who are obsessed with golf do (oh yes, they are also obsessed with golf.)

Michelle has said to me that our experience as children with our dad was vastly different, and I totally believe it.  Her experience was of a typical, 60's era provider figure, and mine was more of someone who could embrace child rearing, and attend recitals and silly school events and bring me to music lessons.  (This was because he worked night shifts.)  But even in this, Michelle says that being able to watch dad raise me helped inspire how she should raise her own child - sort of like watching a second chance take place. A slowed down, happy, smell-the-roses second chance. 

We lost our dad years ago, and having someone to talk to just to remind you of the kind of person you came from, the kind of person you were raised to be, is a wealth that not everyone is granted.  

They say that home is where the heart is, and while I don't have an address latitude/longitude for that location, I can tell you that part of my home rests with Michelle.

###

Yard Work, Adulting

Hello!

Okay, my programming friends - please tell me how far away we are from having Snapchat filters be our real life daily face options.  I'm sitting here without a single lick of beauty product on my body and went to this:

Awesome 50's Labor Day look w/complimentary duck lips

from this:

Ack!

I mean, for real...  Snapchat is working miracles around the world.

Okay, moving on...

All of my plans were thwarted this Labor Day weekend, but for the better, I'm sure. I ended up getting a lot done!

Saturday, I did yard work for hours and hours.  I am quite sure that my neighbors are convinced that I am a vampire.  I never go out in the sun or on hot days - the only time they ever see me doing yard work is when it is overcast, pouring rain, or, as in one case, watering my lawn at 11 PM.

I have talked about my neighbor, George before.  You guys, we love George.  He's the best.  He watches over me, and additionally, can attest to the above.  He's also adjusted to my unusual yard work behavior.

Once, I was power washing my front railings, and it started to pour rain and thunderstorm.  I decided to put the electric tool away while the lightning storm was going on, so I popped a squat on my front stoop, and George came out and yelled at me,  "HEYYYY!!!  GET BACK TO WORK!!!"

Now, they always shout something at me if I am working out in the pouring rain.  It's funny.

Anyway, I got a little bit of poison something from the yard work I did Saturday, and I've been rubbing VapoRub on it (it's all I have in the house) and it's been working.  Fun fact for you there.

I accomplished a lot, including washing everything, completing an entire 8 hour Golden Girl marathon (thank you, TV Land,) sorting through the formidable Pile Of Stuff at the top of the stairs in my attic, painting my front door, and now I have so much yellow paint in my hair, so, colleagues - I am counting on you to help me get it out.  Thanks in advance.

Smidgen is absolutely exhausted from this weekend.  He's out like a light, and it's only 8:30.

Note that Smidgen also has yellow paint in his fur. The apple doesn't fall far.

Adulting

  

Getting older has so many perks.

I do not take for granted this life, being able to wake up in the morning and swing my legs out of bed, hitting the ground running. And I may be biased, but I'm really thankful that I don't have kids yet (or other pressures,) because I've noticed that one of the many, many differences between myself and some other adulting adults  is that I live a relatively unapologetic life.

I am aware that the next few sentences are annoying, and it's stuff you probably already know:
I can do pretty much any darn thing on any day of the week.  I can sleep till whenever I want to on the weekends. I can decide at any point to take a road trip, or heck, even max out my credit cards and head to Australia.

I often say that the main reasons I don't have kids is because of about five main facts:

1. I drop things *
2. I have a terrible attention span and lose people/things/myself in crowds or other visually overwhelming places
3. I fall a lot
4. I like to sleep
5. I am seemingly incapable of regularly grocery shopping or keeping food in my house, or regularly eating

*Update: I was recently cutting a piece off of a large wheel of delicious, warm brie cheese, and the brie started falling off the table.  I dropped everything, including my plate of food and the knife I was using to cut, and this is a prime example of why I don't currently have kids.  If faced with saving falling brie cheese versus holding on to a child, I'm not sure it would go well.

These are all the jokes I use to pass off the awkward, "why don't you have kids?" moments I experience often, but I am actually about 68% serious with those reasons.

A hidden shadow of a possible sixth reason to that list would be that I have developed a strong muscle of resisting guilt.  I know so many parents whom are absolute powerhouse parents and are really nailing this adulting thing.  I sometimes just sit back and wonder how the heck they do it, and still remain so awesome... so plugged in, while remaining so normal, so human.  They've got this.  They were born to be great parents.

I also have a few friends who just can't seem to find that perfect balance/niche/feng shui of life.  Nothing will make me aggressively love on you more than if you start being unjustly self-guilt ridden.  I'm not having it.

I'm going to fight you in the battle you wage against yourself in matters of guilt.  You know how in novels and movies, the sidekick, or the parents, or the best friend always have their thing to say to snap the hero out of their funk?  Well, you can come to me for that.

I've expressed here before that I am an aggressively complimentary person to the point beyond awkward, and right before: "okay, clearly she is in love with me."  Don't worry, I'm like that with a lot of my friends.

In fact, until they get to know me, most of the people who end up being my good friends in the long term think that I had a huge crush on them in the beginning.  This is par for the course for friendship with me.  

Or, the exact opposite happens.  Just this past week, one of my friends/colleagues caught up with me and some other friends/colleagues in the hallway at work.  I was introducing everyone, and my friend said, "Yeah, I wasn't very nice to Veronica when we first started working here, I wasn't sure that I liked her," and we all laughed just a little too hard.  (Actually, now that I'm reflecting on it, wth!?!  I didn't know she didn't like me...)

I am oblivious to people liking/hating me. It makes flirting a real joy - I am oblivious if people are flirting with me.

This would be my attempt at flirting

Anyway, I digress...

One of the awesome things about getting old is that you learn to say "No."  Not just out loud and not just to other people.  You can learn to say no to letting other people or scheduled events boss around your life.  Not to sound like a pompous American, but some of us need to be reminded each day that you have the choice to do almost anything. Many battles are mind over matter.  And for things that are beyond our control, do try to choose the best perception, please.  Fight the good fight.

Reminders:

You can choose to lay in bed all day and feel sorry for yourself.  You can choose to lay in bed all day and feel fantastic about it (but don't - it's really bad for your health.)  You can choose to eat a dozen donuts.  You can choose to call out of work and drive to Niagara Falls. You can choose to spend a whole day with your best friend or your spouse, just the two of you, all day, doing something fun. You can choose to drop the kids off at daycare or at friends/family house and go to the mountains, just to be in the mountains all day (or heck, pull them out of school for the day and go together.)  You can choose to ride your bike from one end of the trail to the other.  You can choose to do a nice thing for a stranger.  You can choose to call a family member with whom you  have not spoken in a long time, even if you might feel like the only person interested in investing in that relationship.  You can choose.  You can choose to act like a tourist for a day in your own city.  You can choose to forgive.  You can choose to wake up next to someone else tomorrow.  You can choose to wake up alone tomorrow, if that is what you really actually need.  You can get out of town.  You can start over.  You can make a plan.  You can say what you mean to say.  You can kiss the girl.  You can cry.  You can break free.

A friendamine recently said to me, 

I've learned that when a friend asks you to have fun, you say, "Yes."

Give forgiveness you've been denying

Question your assumptions

Choose the happy